and today, i am losing one of my closest friends here to auckland in a matter of seven hours.

2# my halloween date, alan, who went as gerard way from my chemical romance.

3# drunkard angels row. it was so funny watching this two guys battling it out on the dance floor.

4# "you won't like it when i'm angry." i love when people play into their character during halloween.

5# the number of jokers i saw: four. the number of joker i saw in a nurse outfit: one. didn't managed to take a photo of joker in nurse outfit because my camera and alan's camera ran out of juice at the same time fml.
6# random stranger who stopped me on the streets for photo op. on my left are god and a chic mummy and on my right is a bloody nurse.

7# see how god is glowing while i said a prayer hehe. :)

8# monkey boy, a very pretty blood-hungry vampire and a mexican.

9# god is technology-savvy because she texts wtf.

10#

11# love how my hair glowed in a fiery red under the uv light at liberty. here i am, waiting to be served a glass of water over the counter with alan and your favourite american boy, sean.

12# we're sexy like that.

13# allow me to let you off with a little secret-i have a thing for vampires in cakey white powdered face wtf.

14# one of the best costumes i saw that night: aladdin with abu.

15# min, in a very cute japanese school girl outfit.

16# here's yosemite sam again.

17# my favourite frenchman remy, who has a thing for chicken rice and mee goreng mamak. a little trivia about remy, he did a two years gig at a private college in KL. i asked him whether he is into malaysian girls and he said yes. anyone wants his number now? i am pimping him out.

18# god pole-danced too wtf.

19# with snow white who i first thought was wonder woman.

20# alan, you're too cute in this photo and yes, i fell asleep there.

this halloween,

number of people who, on first guess, knew that i was blossoms from powerpuff girls: two (how pathetic is that)

number of people who thought i wore too much pink: 32435298712

number of people who dry-humped me: one joker

number of people who said they wanted to get into my pants: six

number of people who stalked me while i pub crawl and offered to buy me a drink after that and then eventually, found me on facebook: one

the amazing night i had, letting my guard down and having fun with my friends: priceless.

this was what i went as this year:-

1# i'm not just a very pink girl. my true halloween identity will be revealed in later photos. but you can start guessing now? (hint: sugar and spice and everything nice)

2# went to a friend's flat party before heading to town. and this is vanessa, who was a spanky policewoman and my hair turned out uber red on vanessa's camera.

3# remy was a french pirate wtf.

4# irine, the farmer girl.

5# alex, who was err, an american. his words not mine.

6# your favourite american boy, sean.

7# jon and i, being silly. and no, that was not the finger you thought it was.

8# i was very happy to see david, apparently.

9# the hardworking physiology student wtf, yosemite sam, the very pink girl, asian osama wtf, the 80s scottish man and the pirate.

10# bff who i am losing to auckland in a week time. :(

11# i pout a lot when i am approaching intoxication limit.

12# cute photo that i like.

13# ahhh, jon!!!

14# me: what are you, marcel?

marcel: i'm arnold schwarzenegger on holiday!

15# terminator in hawaii, me, and a midget pirate haha.

16# sebastian, who went as an emo kid zombie.

17# trina, the black witch.

18# john, the demeaning demon.

19# cherlyn, my future flatmate next year, who went as a skater girl.

20#

21# i went as blossoms from powerpuff girls.

and btw, we made our own dresses, with our friend, josephine's help, nevertheless. sometimes, it's good to have a friend who is doing a degree in fashion design. :)

22# with the boys in my new flat next year. i am so excited *squeals* yes, my flatmate is a red devil wtf. and that's a pretty tree in the background.

24# i am making out with yosemite sam because i have a thing for a man with a mean movember.

25# what's the deal with men and their obsession for artificial facial hair? :D

26# *squeal* i love my movember boys.

and this is just part one...

2) i am so looking forward for the weekend. i have a week break between exams so i can have a little fun for maybe fourty-eight hours, tops. a weekend of halloween parties, dressing up, the unveiling of project PG (hehe!), lethal cocktails and night out in town!

3) had a tea party last night.

the boys decided that it would be funny to abandon me in the living rom to listen to vivo per lei all by myself and stood in my kitchen to have their 'gentlemen's talk that i will never ever understand because a female's brain is generally smaller than an average male's brain wtf'.

4) shane had his wisdom tooth taken off yesterday and he is just being one big sulky baby now. poor thing.

5) i went out with alan yesterday for coffee and a chat. it was good fun, because he took me to this little hidden cafe within the botanical gardens. while i was walking to the gardens, i got a very exciting text from him telling me that he found a venus flytrap in the glasshouse and he wanted me to see it.

and this was the apparent venus fly trap. we later found out it wasn't a venus fly trap, but a very distant cousin, also a carnivorous plant called sarracenia.

we had a good chat on contemporary art, tattoos and piercings, animal testing, great halloween movies, performing surgery on animals, accounting and organic teas, over a nice cup of flat white and banana chocolate crepes. we then had a nice scroll around the gardens. it was a nice perfect afternoon, sunny and bright, until it drenched on us twenty minutes later.

being a veterinary student at the polytechnic, it was only right that our next stop would be the vet clinic cum pet store across the road from the gardens, where i doodled and pressed my face against cute Labrador puppies, fluffy sleepy kittens, vibrantly feathered parrots and morbid guinea pig, who escaped from its little confinement when i opened the doors to its little hut to have a good look at it. alan and i had to chase after it before anyone in the clinic realized that there was a guinea pig at loose and i was the culprit that made it happen.

i have to say, this is such a bad photo of me. very bad. this is what exams does to me; acne out, i'm all jagged and my hair's like a huge out-of-control beehive.

6) i wish it was sunny outside, but it's cold, wet and windy instead. /sulk.

7) i'm hungry now.

photos from my residential college's farewell dinner two fridays ago.

1# the dinner was held at the carisbrook stadium, in the executive room. you know, the glassed room overlooking the green field where big shoguns watch the game from? that room.

2# the flatmate before we board the bus to the stadium. as always, my flat was fashionably late.

3# outside the stadium with kamani and connie. i looked so happy here.

4# david and rob were tickling me to death, hence, the massive giggle plastered on my face in this photo.

5# my two bitches, who first spot me with the camera as they came down from the second bus and went, "oh gawd, here we go again." wtf

6# do not know what i was doing here but oh well, awesome action shot.

7# awesome or what? we had the whole stadium to ourselves.

8# dinner was divine. the sundried tomatoes that came with the starter platter was malto bene (very delicious in italian).

9# nah, photo of your favourite hot american boy, sean. please do not salivate too much. it's weird.

ok to clear the air a wee bit, i am not going out with sean, as many of you had thought and as i was told. we are very good friends, someone that i will go to for my boy problems, and vice versa. so, dating is out of the question and not ideal. but i still love him lots, no question. besides, i am seeing someone else if you read my blog long enough to know and i am doing the whole long distance thing at the moment which by the way, totally sucks.

10# my neighbours.

11# taking a photo from guy's shiny new toy because he won the toroan of the year award. boohoo.

12# because you all say i don't take enough photos with girls, so nah, here you go too.

13# orgasmic chocolate mousse in an edible chocolate cup.

that's all for today folks. i have to still do a pile high of reading before calling it a day. fingers cross for me, kiddos for i'll be having my first paper next tuesday. /gulp.

before i let you go, there is a video i want to show you all. it is done by my friend, kasper, who is also the lead actor in the video.

the video is really clever, in my opinion, especially the facebook part. "ignore, ignore, ignore!" wtf.

this morning, kasper and sean cracked me up so badly over skype when they tried to sing 'my heart will go on' by celine dion, using arnold 'what's his surname?' schwarzenegger's steroid infused voice. use your imagination now and laugh.

2) watch sean play at the open mic at the bog.

it was his first open mic in his life so this performance is something really. he played two songs that he wrote and another kiwi favourite, flight of the conchord's the most beautiful girl in the room, which he first played when i first met him back in july and this is when i was awed by his talent because really, it is that hard to find an american homeboy to be so passionate about kiwi music.

speaking of the first time we met, i just got home from my two weeks backpacking trip to chrischurch and wellington and i remember meeting sean for the first time the evening i got back and not having a good impression on this very cute flatmate of peter's from detroit. for the next couple of weeks, we just made courtesy his and byes when we see each other until one day, we actually sat down in a big group of friends and share conversations, next thing i know, we went out together to parties or just to grab a bite or coffee, baked marbled cheesecake brownies and sat on the pavement of grass at two in the morning on a saturday night just to sober up, laugh and talk. well though, our own innuendo brought us together; me with shane and he with this other girl so sometimes, it's weird how things turned out at the end of the day, sometimes for the best really, although the journey towards this happy ending can sometimes be led with tragedies and hardship. i found a friend that i know i will value for the rest of my life.

last semester break, i got a text from timtam, when i was up in wellington, and he told me in its content that his face had been watery all day long, on the day his girlfriend, shannon left for home. this coming from a 25-years-old guy who buffed his way in the gym, lifting weights every single night. shannon and timtam were together for six weeks, the same length of time that i am in my very own relationship. sometimes, i really wonder why we gave in to little details like these, knowingly that the next person would long be gone in a matter of time, and you might not see them for a while, but i had come up with the conclusion that we let ourselves melt in this bittersweet mould, partly for the emotions, partly for the curiousity to explore the many what ifs in the process and partly because we are crazy to think that a miracle would happened to get things sorted for the best eventually.

this afternoon, shane picked me up to have lunch with his dad at the esplanade. as i rudely distracted myself from the conversation to gaze on the swift movements of the waves as it landed roughly on the beach, i overheard shane telling his dad about the first time we went out together, the night where it all happened and this was when, the water became less interesting to me once more. in my silent grin, i played that description like a tape in my head. it was six saturdays ago, and i just got home from town and i was really upset, despite the night out, for i had just been through a long turbulent week and there he was, online on msn and i was in one of my many emoe state and in need of a friend. he offered to take me for a drive to clear my head and i took it. next thing i know, we were at the tallest lookout in dunedin and we talked the moonlight away and we went to the beach, where he showed me some really random jujitsu moves. after that, it all started and ended with a kiss.

and then it all jolted on me, one by one. his love for reading and his ability to speed read and the million and one books he owned, our intense debate on the economy and the recession on the first date wtf, sunday walks at the reservoir and him being annoyed as i harassed every other cutesy dogs that came my way, late night drives to mosgiel with a quick stop at the gas station to grab two cones of boysenberry and chocolate ice cream, the cheeky smiles he carved on his face everytime i admitted defeat to the little games we play, times where he wrapped me around on my waist as i get ready in front of the mirror in the morning, rugby league, falling asleep cozily on his arms on the couch by the flaring fireplace, turkish kebabs with a very cheeky turkish waiter, the x number of times we literally wanted to bite each other head's off if it was legit to do so, chocolate chip muffins, bed hogging, our morbid slapping game, whiskey and coke, silly animal nicknames, the many times he had to wake up in the middle of the night to tuck me back properly to bed because i smartly decided to push the blankets away and then, fidget in my sleep because it was too cold, quarter pounder suppers, lawn mowing, dkny be delicious for men, his road rage, me laughing at his road rage, my blonde moment with the ear muffs, lazy weekend sleep-ins that were spend in each other arms while watching family guy, complaining about having morning breath but never once deter us from giving out kisses, terrorizing the ducks at the pond, vanilla scented candles, chocolate fishes, days where i wished that i had never met him because it would be easier and less angry, long walks on the beach and a very fluffy but also very spoilt white cat.

i brushed through the afternoon as we arm wrestled and teased while we intimately shared the little time we have. i foolishly thought that it would be easy to bid adieu when he was taking me home. as his car stalled, waiting for the lights to turn green at the last intersection before my flat, he said to me, "moosey, you're almost home", which i sheepishly replied, "i know," secretly wishing that time would stand still. the car pulled over on the side road leading to the driveway towards my flat and i dragged my body over for what i initial thought would be a quick hug to make it less painful but he held me tighter, making it so hard to say goodbye. as i rubbed my face on his tshirt, i told him how much i'll miss him, to be returned with a similar syllabus of words along with promises of a homecoming visit and webcam sessions on skype.

that saturday night, six weeks ago changes everything. admist all the anger, the doubts, the frustration, the sulkiness fits, the loving cuddles, the endless tickles and the silly awkward jokes, this is my happy and he is my chuck in his own little discreet ways and i was glad that i found it for a while.

you'll always be my dopy pooh bear :)